The sense of aliveness after the storm.
The wind is quite strong, pulling the curtain here and there in all directions and the sun is so high, already so high, 9 in the morning. My handwriting is crappy because the ink rom this pen seems to be not flowing well, though I still have about 1cm much ink left in the pen.
I was reading “300 Arguments” by Sarah Manguso and thought about the length of writing, how her words stand opposite to mine, short, precise, sometimes meandering but short and condensed, full of aliveness in it. It’s sort of like series of snapshots, photograph which can capture that very moment of something with such reality that you feel like the wind is actually flowing out of the picture, as with from her words. I would long to write like such, but struggle to, because I love just watching the flow of words and to keep it flowing, it needs to keep going forever, oh I don’t know.
I am going to list some of my favourite words, although I loved every bit of this, some that just got stuck in my minds, refusing to go anywhere.
67. “Think of this as a short book composed of what I hoped would be a long book’s quotable passage.”
25. “Slowly, slowly, I accumulate sentences. I have no idea what I’m doing until suddenly it reveals itself, almost done.”
13. “I wish I could ask the future whether I should give up or keep trying. Then again, what if trying, even in the face of certain failure, feels good as accomplishing? What is it’s even better? And here we are again.”
Her words are philosophical but very close to our sense of living. It’s not in the distance but so close like she is speaking with her friend in the seat behind you. It’s that tone, witty but sharp, that short sharp pressure, tugging into your mind as you go forward through the 300 small arguments she makes towards her neighbour, lover, friends and herself.
She walks back and forward through time, to small and wide human being who read and don’t read, I would re-read the same sentence more than twice, just to repeat the argument in my head and listen to its wind.
Love these arguments, argue towards these arguments, get confused and lost and found.
“Certainty is the opposite of thinking; I’m certain of it.”
Book referenced; “300 Arguments” by Sarah Manguso