Enduring and continuing

Continuing might be one of the simplest and the most difficult task we are forced to face in life, many times throughout the process of living, and we fail, too many times too. Because there are many reasons not to those things that seemed so important yesterday, that I have more important things to do right now then work for love and dream which all seems totally impossible in real life and that we are too afraid that once we start, there is no going back and now that starts sounding like one of the most common used and pathetic excuse found.

And yet, somehow I end up writing, at night, during the small times in between and when I am in crisis. It’s where I run to, when many things seem utterly impossible and you just feel like throwing everything away, but I notice hey, you’re still writing! and that goes on and on, repeat itself through life.

And I was thinking this after reading this article, and revisiting the latest essay by Murakami, where he talks about writing as a profession. He has talked about the importance of such concentration and the endurance, the power of keep writing, after years and years, for decades, and on and on.

Haruki Murakami: Talent Is Nothing Without Focus and Endurance

Fortunately, these two disciplines—focus and endurance—are different from talent, since they can be acquired and sharpened through training. You’ll naturally learn both concentration and endurance when you sit down every day at your desk and train yourself to focus on one point. This is a lot like the training of muscles I wrote of a moment ago. You have to continually transmit the object of your focus to your entire body, and make sure it thoroughly assimilates the information necessary for you to write every single day and concentrate on the work at hand. And gradually you’ll expand the limits of what you’re able to do. Almost imperceptibly you’ll make the bar rise. This involves the same process as jogging every day to strengthen your muscles and develop a runner’s physique. Add a stimulus and keep it up. And repeat. Patience is a must in this process, but I guarantee results will come.

It’s always hard, especially when there are abundance of things you can do to (literally) kill time and go through reality without facing it at all. It’s so easy to run into another direction if you don’t like it, it’s super easy to give up everything. And so, that is why, now, that we continue the things we know that we love, to endure through the days when you feel like there is no hope at all, but you just want to keep writing for many unexplainable reasons.

And yes, I still get up every morning, feeling shitty about life and wanting to give up everything while reading amazing articles and books but I am writing like this now too, going nowhere maybe, going somewhere, maybe. I don’t know and that’s all good too because I am writing still, and it is a part of me, and some days I would want to stop and throw it all out the window but I have decided to write with my life and I will keep writing no matter yes?



P.S this beautiful emotional raw article on everything that I am, and one of the reason I can keep standing at all. I really really needed this.

I want to quit. Right now.



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